A comedian friend of mine once explained the two simple reasons why teens are likely to have sex: It's free and it's fun. It's those two qualities, interestingly, that also describe the best ways to prevent teens from having sex too early. Of course, "too early" is a moving target but whatever your view on the appropriate age for sex, it's worth discussing with the teens. Since it's not only free and fun but, also, can have real world consequences.

One of the places online I like to check in on every once and a while is stayteen.org. It's sometimes hilarious, always charming, and dedicated to celebrating the greatest things about being a teenager while encouraging kids to delay sex. It's worth visiting if only to see the teen-produced winning campaign ad "Stay Chicken". But once you're there you begin to unearth a treasure chest of facts about teen sexual behavior, including studies that show what really works to prevent teens from having sex.

For example, two third of teens who have had sex report the location was in their family home, their partner's family home or a friends house. 70% had sex in the evening or the night, not directly after school as one would guess. The researchers of that study conclude that supervised activities like dances, sporting events and game nights may be a powerful tool for preventing teen pregnancy. Parents could even just make their presence a little more obvious when 'the crush' is around. June was the month that the greatest number of teens reported first having sex (13.7%), but for the most part there was no real difference between school months and summer months for the onset of sexual activity. Most teens describe their first sexual partner as a friend who they've met through school, friends or their place of worship. Two-thirds of teens also report "couple-like" behavior before the first time they had sex including going out together alone, meeting their partner's parents, thinking of themselves as a couple, spending less time with friends and more time with each other, exchanging presents, saying "I love you." Public and observable behaviors that offer obvious clues to parents to have an honest and open discussion with their teen about the relationship, the consequences of sex, the benefits of delaying sex, and protection. There's also some real eye-openers for parents relying on the abstinence-until-marriage approach. One in five teens preserving their virginity was having oral sex. So abstinence should probably be discussed in detail.

So it turns out parents can help teens delay sexual initiation in simple and straightforward ways. Plan group activities that are fun in the evening, notice when things are starting to get serious with 'the crush', talk about sex with your teen and check to see that parents are around when they're together. Funny thing is that doing all these things will be rewarding for parents too.